A few weeks ago, I sat down with one of my seniors and worked through her college list two schools at a time. “If you got into these two, which one would you pick?” We compared another pair, then another, before narrowing the conversation to her likely schools. She wants to go somewhere warm, so her list is full of Southern schools, several of them reaches. When we got to her likely options, she picked one right away and said she’d be happy there. I felt much more comfortable with her reach choices after that. She could already name a likely school she wanted to attend if the other applications didn’t work out.
Every cycle, we meet a handful of students whose plans depend almost entirely on admission to one highly selective college, usually a top 20 school. They dismiss the targets we suggest and struggle to imagine being happy anywhere else. By spring, they’ve attached so much meaning to that decision that a rejection can feel like a judgment on everything they’ve done in high school. I worry about that. Seventeen is young to feel that years of work will only count if one admissions office says yes. October gives us some time to address it, while students can still research schools and adjust their applications.
Talk through the likely schools
Sit down with your kid and compare a few pairs of colleges. Ask which they’d choose if both admitted them, and let them explain why. You may learn that something you thought mattered to them barely enters the conversation. Then set aside the reaches and targets, leaving only the likely schools, and ask: “If these were your options, where would you go?”
A quick answer is encouraging. Follow it with, “What would you like about going there?” They should know enough about the school to give you an answer beyond its location or acceptance rate. If they struggle to name one, ask what’s missing. They may need to learn more about the schools already on the list, or they may need some different options. For most students, I want two or three targets they’d be glad to attend, along with likely schools they’ve researched seriously. Check the admission requirements for their intended program and make sure the family can afford the options you’re counting on.
Applying to several reaches
Families sometimes look at ten colleges with admit rates around 10% and assume at least one will say yes. Even in a hypothetical situation where each application had an independent 10% chance of success, the chance of at least one acceptance would be about 65%. That leaves roughly a 35% chance of ten rejections.
That calculation makes assumptions we can’t make about college admissions. A college’s overall admit rate describes its applicant pool; a particular student’s chances could be higher or lower. Applications also carry the same transcript, activities, and personal essay from school to school. Many of the strengths and weaknesses an admissions office sees will appear in the other applications, too.
With some of my more stubborn seniors, I open a dice app and choose a 20 sided die. One number represents an acceptance, giving each roll a 5% chance. We roll once for each reach school and see what happens. Sometimes they roll an acceptance right away and decide I’ve proved their point, so the exercise can backfire. We use it to talk about uncertainty, with the understanding that their actual chances will vary by school. Apply to the reaches that matter to your kid, and give the targets and likely schools enough attention that several rejections would still leave them with options they want.
Read the early decision rate carefully
Last week, I wrote about whether early decision makes sense. This week, I want to look more closely at the acceptance rates families use to make that decision. Suppose a college admits 10% of its early decision applicants and 5% of its regular decision applicants. It’s easy to conclude that applying early would double your kid’s chances.
Those pools contain different applicants. At many selective colleges, recruited athletes apply in the early round after their academic credentials have already been reviewed. Dartmouth’s admissions office explicitly warns that including those athletes makes the apparent early decision advantage look larger. The published rates don’t show how the same student would fare in both rounds, and they don’t give families enough information to calculate an individual applicant’s odds. Early decision can still make sense when the school is a clear first choice and the family has checked the financial commitment. Keep working on the other applications while you wait.
Leave time to finish the application
Some families hear “apply early” and assume they should submit as soon as the application opens. Timing deserves a closer look at each college. Wake Forest is a useful example: its Early Decision I round uses rolling review, so completing an application sooner can bring an earlier answer. In its early decision guidance, however, the university says that submitting sooner within that round does not improve the likelihood of admission. It also explains that very early applicants may have no senior year grades available for review. If the committee wants to see those grades or better understand the applicant pool, it can defer the application to regular decision.
For applications due November 1, I’m telling my seniors to aim for Wednesday, October 28. This year, October 31 falls on a Saturday and November 1 on a Sunday. Finishing on Wednesday gives us two school days to catch an error, ask a question, or resolve a submission problem before the weekend. Check the deadlines for supporting documents, scholarships, and financial aid separately.
Consider ED2 before December
Some students put all their energy into one early application and leave the others untouched until the decision arrives. A disappointing result then comes with a lot of unfinished work. Research an Early Decision II option now, while continuing to prepare the rest of the list. That gives your kid time to consider the school before December decisions affect how they feel about their choices.
Lehigh, for example, offers ED2 with a January 1 application deadline. It is a binding commitment to enroll if admitted. Whether it belongs on your kid’s list depends on their academic record, interests, and enthusiasm for attending. Before choosing any ED2 school, use its net price calculator and discuss the estimated cost as a family. As the College Board explains, those figures are estimates, so ask the financial aid office about anything that could materially change the result. Your kid should be comfortable committing to that school and giving up the opportunity to compare other admission and aid offers. If they want to keep comparing, regular decision may suit them better.
What to do this week
Compare a few pairs of colleges, then ask where your kid would go if only the likely schools admitted them.
Identify two or three targets they’d be glad to attend. Research additional options if that part of the list is thin.
Check that the likely schools fit their intended program and the family’s budget.
Discuss whether an ED2 option makes sense, and research it before December.
Keep the regular decision applications moving while waiting for early results.
Put Wednesday, October 28 on the calendar as your family’s target for finishing November 1 applications.
If none of the likely schools appeals to your kid, choose two realistic options to research together this weekend. Talk again once they’ve had a closer look.
🗓️ NYC Opportunities
Every issue, we'll point you toward specific NYC programs, deadlines, and events that help your student explore what they're actually curious about and build the kind of depth colleges are looking for. Here's what's worth your attention this week:
1. Open House New York Weekend
When: October 16–18; hours vary by location
Who can go: Open to the public; check each listing for age restrictions, accessibility, and ticket requirements
Cost: Check individual listings
Ever wonder what’s inside the buildings you pass every day? Open House New York Weekend offers a chance to explore more than 300 destinations across the five boroughs, with tours and visits that take you behind the scenes of the city. Many locations welcome drop-in visitors. Others require tickets because of space or security limits. Tickets were released on October 2 through Eventbrite, so check what’s still available and build your weekend around a few favorites.
Why it matters: If architecture, engineering, history, or city planning interests you, this is a chance to see those subjects come to life. Start browsing now so you have time to plan your route.
Explore the lineup and plan your visit
2. Scholastic Art & Writing Awards 2027 (Grades 7 to 12)
Deadline: 2027 application closes October 6, 2026 at 8 PM ET; application fee applies, with fee waivers available
Apply by: Regional deadlines begin December 1; check your region’s separate art and writing deadlines
Cost: $15 per individual entry or $40 per portfolio; fee waivers are available Have a story, poem, photograph, painting, or other creative work you’re proud of? Entries for the 2027 Scholastic Art & Writing Awards opened October 1. Two upcoming webinars can help you prepare. On October 15 at 7 p.m. ET, past writing jurors will explain what they look for. On October 22 at 7 p.m. ET, seniors can learn how to put together an art or writing portfolio. Registration is required.
Why it matters: Submitting gives you a reason to revisit your work, sharpen it, and share it with a wider audience. Starting now leaves room to revise without a last-minute rush.
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